When will it end?  If I were asked to define the word catharsis, I would say a relatively short instance of… let us say: turmoil, in which one’s beliefs are called in to question, whether in a matter of love, or conscience, or religion, mores, honor, or what-the-hell, and when it’s done you come out stronger, cleaner.
Sometimes you ask yourself: when will my catharsis end? It hasn’t destroyed me, so when will I come out clean and strong, better for the experience? Is it just me? Am I sort of sandbagging my catharsis? Is it not a real catharsis at all, but just the usual everyday bullshit? Or just a sort of little test-catharsis, to see if I’m up to the real thing? Is life just one huge never-ending catharsis? Yadayadayada.
Maybe you just need more time. Time to stem the curse of the Gods, and forget the damage done. No light task, as any fool would admit.
Listening to Goin’ Out West from Tom Waits.

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