I Was Fairly Well Contented

In which Pogues song do we find this phrase? Try to find out without using Google, please. It might even force you to listen to The Pogues, which can only do you good.
Oh, you swine, you went and used Google after all, didn’t you. Tsk, tsk.
Hah, well, I tricked you, because I really wanted to direct your attention to the word malcontent. This word is, in fact, not the opposite of contentedness, but no one ever says that anyway.
Tricky little words, there. They make me think of my English teachers, whom I loved.

teacher-145377_1280They hated me, though. I was that little knee-jerk-nerd-bastard in English class who asked if „that was also the definition as found in the Oxford English Dictionary…?“ because I knew exactly that they didn’t know, and I enjoyed putting them at a disadvantage very much. Of course they knew ten times as much as I did about the English language, I didn’t know what the Oxford English Dictionary had to say about it any more than they did, even though I did in fact have said dictionary available to me at home. I even looked in to it now and again.
But, I digress.
Malcontent.

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Nyap

Nyap, that is the nearest equivalent that I can make up to the German word „jein“, which means yes and no bundled together. Like when one of my workmates, a confirmed misogynist in his way, asked me the other day how I liked living without a woman in my life. Nyap, I said. It’s a quick way of saying: there are pros and cons.
A definite con is that I feel lonely as hell. A pro is that I don’t have to worry about seeming to be an insensitive asshole. I am not an insensitive asshole, but women seem to mistake me for one again and again. How that comes to be I can not fathom. I have met real insensitive assholes and I can say, with absolute certainty, that I am not one. Sometimes it makes me wonder if women do not just simply enjoy accusing their men of being insensitive assholes, regardless.
In any case, the word nyap, which does, in fact, not exist in the English language, might have many wonderful applications. Most people would say „maybe“ or „I’m not sure“, but „nyap“ would be so much more succinct and to the point. It expresses the feeling of ambivalence wonderfully. And it sounds so cool.
So, my suggestion is, dear reader, that you embrace the word „nyap“ and propagate it to the best of your ability. If you do so consistently enough it might even be said you have helped a new word in to being. No one will know it was you that did it if it truly does spread enough to become a part of the language, but you know, and that should be enough.
Of course, I’ll be there, in the background, thinking haha, nyap was my idea. My readers are all just henchmen, pawns in my game to change the English language single-handedly… muahaha. Delusions of grandeur? Nyap.