Hellstrøm’s First Kiss

Whew. But the last kiss I had was far, far better. Need I say more?

Hellstrøm is a Superhero

Alright, I’s a superhero. I can fly, I got x-ray eyes, or sumthin’. Mighty thews and all. What’s I gonna do? I’ll tell ya (you never woulda guessed, would ya, you’da thought I’d hull myself in decorous silence). I knows I can save the world… or? I can overthrow a bad government in two secs. I can stop atom bombs with a snap of the fingers. I got the power, darlin’. Toss a baby out the window, I’ll hear it scream half across the world, and come runnin’ and catch it.
But there is one thing I can never conquer: the human will to do ill. That apely proclivity to be evil. And, as a perfectly civil and well adjusted superhero, I have no understanding for that proclivity.

What choices remain for me then? What to do, when I believe in the best possible truth? Either I kill all of humanity, because it can never ever live up to that truth, or I kill myself, because I can not stand it any more. I can not stand the fact that all my powers are not equal to the task of changing an ape in to a human being.
Not a single fucking ape. Not even me.

Runnin’ Hot

Sometimes I feel my heart runnin’ hot. Too much coal, damn that fucking incompetent shoveler. I’d fire the bastard if I could, but I’m stuck with him. He’s got the job for life, nothin’ I can do about it. It’s runnin’ hot, and I could cut down a sequoia single-handed as an appetizer, drink an entire bottle of whiskey and get in a fist fight one against three for the main course, and strangle a bear for desert. Too much energy ain’t healthy, and if it goes on like this, the engine will burst. Shards of metal flying in all directions… burning the candle on both ends ain’t nothing against this.

The Mekons

I’ll let this speak for itself.

„Quotable“

Those who believe in telekinetics, raise my hand.
– Kurt Vonnegut

Intuition: Hit Or Miss

If you take a guess, and you turn out to be right, you call it intuition. I just knew it, you say to yourself. If you guess wrong, you say: bad luck. Why don’t you say it was simply good luck when you guessed right? Why is that suddenly supposed to be intuition? The fact is, you didn’t have the slightest idea either way. You just got lucky.

Use that nutshell on your shoulders, you crazy ape.

This is nature at its most haphazard. Homo sapiens use positive reinforcement as a survival tactic: when something works, we do it that way again. But often enough, it was just plain luck. The next time you play the odds without knowing the odds, think about that for a moment. Use that little nutshell on your shoulders. For Christ’s sake, don’t trust your intuition. You intuition is a bloody roulette wheel.
Billions of crazy little apes playing roulette in the Great Casino of Life… and we wonder why our world is so fucked up.